How To Use Jealousy To Your Advantage

Posted on June 22, 2013

If it wasn’t common knowledge before, it must be now that Dr. Phil lists it as the one of the 5 Ways To Break A Bad Habit, right? What I’m proposing is to use the same technique Nicorette gum uses to help people stop smoking – replace the bad habit with a good habit! Replace jealousy with curiosity.

As with everything, this is much easier said than done, but honestly, this emotion is probably the easiest to replace for a couple of reasons:

1. Most people suppress their jealousy for a long time. Unlike when something makes you angry, you don’t usually boil over with jealousy immediately. It usually has to build up over long periods of time, like jealousy among siblings.

2. Just like how people love those ‘diets’ where you can still eat whatever you want, you still get to feel jealousy. So I guess you’re not technically replacing initial jealousy, just the long-term jealousy.

So, what are you supposed to do when you find yourself feeling jealous of someone? 

Simple, try to think of why you’re jealous of that person- and be specific! ‘They just have it all.’ Does not cut it. What specifically do they have that you want? i.e. amazing marriage, beautiful house that’s always clean, close family, great job, etc.

How can you learn from them?

This means that the closer you are to the person, the luckier you are! Cinderella is a classic example of sisters being jealous of each other. What the ugly step-sisters don’t realize is that they have front row seats to learning how they can be as carefree and happy- or whatever else they’re jealous of Cinderella for. I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume that the ugly sisters are the type of people who would watch the Kardashians- due to their obsession with fashion. They seem like they’d be the type of people who hold celebrities they’ve never met- and probably will never meet in their life- on a pedestal, but let their jealousy of someone close to them divide their family.

The root of society’s intrigue with celebrities is jealousy- at the end of the day we only watch because we secretly want to be them. The Kardashians are enough proof of that.

Why is it easy to study (aka read about, watch, follow, etc) celebrities we’re jealous of but don’t even know, but so hard to admit that we have something to learn from someone close to us?

Til next time – always be learning!

Edit: 10/22/2016 Still researching & learning :) and found this video about dealing with jealousy

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